An unbearable self-realization

It’s the end of April and it still doesn’t feel like spring in the Ottawa Valley.

The weather people still use “flurries” in their forecast vocabulary. I think the landlord has already turned off the heat in our building. Time to write another admonishing email.

My inner grumpy bear wanted to sleep from January 2nd to March 20th, to burn off all the fat that I so efficiently added on over the previous months.

Just getting to the day job by public transit and home again during the winter was gruelling. Instead of having the luxury to sleep during those dark months, I binged on NetFlix and nibbled on tasty treats when I got home.

Black cat ipad bear sketch

“Oh, Mistress. I can’t bear to look!”

A couple of weeks ago, when my stretchy Mom Jeans were feeling snug, I decided I had enough. I pushed myself out for morning walks around the neighbourhood. It was time well spent instead of in front of a screen.

I wrote motivational reminders and posted them around le petit apartment.

It has been nine days straight of getting out there – even in the rain! What I like about the early morning walks is that the fresh air and chattering birds provide added inspiration to my semi waking state. I still have to wear layers and gloves. Things are still brown and grey. There is hope that Spring will come…


Early morning stroll,
I tiptoe through the dew worms,
drenched on the sidewalk.

Awash in birdsong
umbrella drum taps with rain
coaxing out the green

It’s hard work convincing your difficult, stubborn self to get out there – as weather permits. If you can’t, there’s always that yoga mat waiting to be unrolled again.

Thanks for dropping by. What are you doing to sweep away the winter funk and dust?




About shewrite63

I am Theresa. I am a Mother, Grandmother and intermittent writer. I published a bittersweet novel in 2011 under the pen name of Florence T Lyon. I am also a real life survivor, community volunteer, Archives and Records Management graduate, and long-time IT support worker trying to keep up with technological changes. Can't eke a living off of my writing skills - yet!
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1 Response to An unbearable self-realization

  1. Pingback: What was I thinking?! | Deep Blonde Thoughts

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